4 Weeks and I want to return him
During the day, my son is pretty damn easy to get along with.
Feed him, change him, play with him, put him to bed. Lather, rinse, repeat as needed.
Now when Mary and I try to go to sleep, he starts screwing with us. I mean it, the little turd is using psychological warfare on us. I feed him, he falls asleep with the bottle in his mouth. I lay him down to sleep. He wakes 5 minutes later, screaming as though someone has stabbed him in his little head! I mean Jesus H (H is for Hosanah) Christ! So he's hungry again. I feed him the rest of his bottle and put him to bed. He wakes 5 minutes later screaming again. Acts like he's hungry, so I feed him part of a new bottle.
Was he hungry? Hell NO!
He was gearing up to spray baby puke all over his mother and myself. Let me tell ya, if you've never witnessed baby vomit, it is a sight to behold. So he lays there grunting and fidgeting as though he's uncomfortable, so you check and change his diaper, like you did 15 minutes ago when he woke up screaming the first time.
Then you stick a pacifier in his mouth to shut him up so you don't eat a gun barrel. HE PULLS THE DAMNED THING OUT HIMSELF, AND WAkES UP SCREAMING ABOUT IT!
I'm not cut out to be a parent. Tomorrow I'm gonna perform a do it yourself vacectomy while this pain is still fresh. HOW THE HELL DO PEOPLE HAVE MORE THAN ONE OF THESE?!?
I have an older sibling, what were my parents thinking when they tried, INTENTIONALLY, to get pregnant with me?
I know this doesn't make alot of sense right now, but I'm ready to to to to st ae as
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a3
SNAP!
Goodnight.
posted by Stubbed My Toe at 11:05 PM
4 Comments:
Just remember that the good news, and the bad news is all the same; it won't last forever.
Hang in there.
Mom
11:22 PM
So I probably don't need to tell you that it WILL get better? 4 weeks was about the time we bought the miracle blanket...and that thing was a life saver!
And do his sleeping arrangements include a vibraty thing? That helps alot, too! In fact, I just heard X-man wake up, but the vibration came on and he went back to sleep!! Fabu!
6:47 AM
I think my Christmas present to myself will be a vasectomy.
11:08 AM
when i read your blog i felt a wave of familiarity. tryston was so fussy, we diagnosed him as "gassy" and gave him all kinds of weird rememdies in desperate need of sleep. the one that actually worked was boiling an onion and having him drink the water. i swear to you, i would have give him anything, at that point. but, he grew out of it, and now, we have a totally new set of problems. i know exactly what you are going through, and, i know. it's a cruel joke of mother nature, by the time you figure out what you've got yourself into, it's too late to back out. i'm with you, though. why anyone would do this more than once astounds me.
1:56 PM
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